Losing Confidence

When you spend many years together with someone, you become partners and confidants in everything. Lynn and I were like that. We always made decisions together about almost everything. We shared secrets and dreams. We supported each other in all endeavors. What I couldn't do, she did. What she couldn't do, I did. Decisions were…Read more Losing Confidence


Days on a Calendar

Yesterday was the 39th anniversary of my marriage to Lynn. As with last year's, Lynn is no longer here to celebrate with me. Of course, celebration is more of a remembrance now. A mental walk through memories and emotions, pain and joy. All week leading up to the date I was feeling "off" in my…Read more Days on a Calendar

Losing Faith

I try to live my life with a mind toward kindness, honesty and love. Some might call it living a Christian life, but there are many Christians that live with hate and greed. So I choose to not use that description. I don't always follow a righteous path, but I do make the effort. God…Read more Losing Faith


Losing Youth

I have come to realize some new levels of my grief. Losing Lynn was not just losing my wife. The surface losses are of course the loss of my partner and confidant, the loss of my lover and the loss of my best friend. But there are deeper losses that don't reveal themselves at first.…Read more Losing Youth


Moving forward (a little)

I've been feeling lately like I need a change. I've looked at moving to a new house and also looked at buying a new car. I am organizing and getting rid of some things that haven't been used in a long time. I can't tell if I'm trying to eliminate so many ever present memories,…Read more Moving forward (a little)


What Remains

Take my sight from me, for I can only see your smiling face. Take my nose from me, for I can only smell your scent. Take all sound from my ears, for I can only hear your voice. Take my voice from me, for I can only call out your name. Take the skin from…Read more What Remains


When is it time?

I recently met a woman who had lost her husband about 14 months ago, around the same time I lost Lynn. She was starting to date again, and had met someone through an online dating site. I asked her how she was able to move on so soon and her answer was that she just…Read more When is it time?